Dear Texas: Go the fuck away
It’s been some time since I’ve done one of these posts, and I hadn’t even really intended to be writing any sort of “series,” anyway. But, hey, maybe it’s a decent idea. I can certainly think of a thing or two to say to one state in particular, of late… I actually wrote this up about a week ago and then thought, hm, isn’t this just gratuitous even by SB “standards?” But having given it further reflection, actually: no. The problem is not going away, and may well be getting worse. So, then…
Dear Tejas,
Could you just go the fuck away, at some point here, already?
Seriously, for all that we hear about fucking Texas this, Texas that, Texas Texas Texas all fucking day long day after day week after week all year ’round, what positive contribution to anything has come out of Texas in recent memory?
The Mavericks’ victory in this year’s NBA finals, maybe? I didn’t personally see this as positive, but I realize that many non-Texans nonetheless embraced the Dallas team as America’s sweethearts in spite of being the expensive toy of Mark Cuban, whom most people otherwise agree is a dumbfuck jerk. Aside from myself, there was indeed widespread sentiment that a Mavs victory was desirable, because old Dirk Nowitzki “needed” to get a championship finally, and more importantly because someone needed to prevent the Miami Heat from getting one, because they had been appointed as the “bad guys,” because they seemed to be obnoxious and full of themselves… like, in other words, the entire state of Texas…
Still, for argument’s sake, I’ll grant that the state of Texas was somehow the savior of the NBA this year. Considering all the noise which comes from that particular renegade former province of Mexico, I don’t think “hero of the NBA finals” goes very far. What else does Texas have to its credit?
…yes, that would be the sound of crickets chirping if this were a podcast.
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